Why Is It Important To Have Flexible Thinking?
Why Are Some Children Inflexible?
Children who have difficulty with flexible thinking often have a hard time. They may become upset, have tantrums or meltdowns, and show other signs of distress. This can also create a hard time for caregivers who want to support the child, but who may find they are revolving their lives around a child’s inflexibilities in an attempt to reduce a child’s stress and keep the peace.
Cognitive Flexibility and Anxiety Often Go Hand-in-Hand
Cognitive flexibility is an executive function. Some children with difficulties in this area can be anxious when there is an expectation to handle unexpected events, transition to a new activity, and/or make other shifts in their focus. It is not uncommon to see rigidities in a variety of areas. This is common with autism, but is not limited to people with that diagnosis.
Sometimes children with anxiety become inflexible because of a specific fear. For example, a child who is afraid of bees may insist on taking a specific route when walking to avoid a home with a lot of flowers near the sidewalk. Inflexibilities may become more extreme if other fears are added or bees are seen in new environments.
Learning to be flexible is a life skill. When teaching it to children it can be helpful to help them understand why they are being asked to expand their comfort zone. Here are some reasons we can give them.
Why Is It Important to Be Flexible?
Life is unpredictable.
You can’t control other people.
Not being flexible may make you think that things are all good or all bad. The problem with this thinking is that it can keep children from trying challenging things if they view themselves as being bad at something.
When you are flexible you can learn to see things in a different way which can help you solve problems.
It’s stressful! Knowing how to deal with unexpected events reduces feelings of overwhelm.
How Can I Help a Child Be More Flexible?
- Start using the word “flexible” when you are telling stories about what you had to do to be flexible that day.
2. Make small changes in the routines that have rigidities
3. See our other blogs on the subject.
- This one has helpful tools to use when a child get “stuck”: Activities That Bring Quiet Order
4. Sign up for our email list! You’ll get education and strategies to address self-regulation and social emotional wellness for children in your inbox.
5. Help children learn why being flexible is important, learn strategies to be more flexible, and practice being flexible with the Flexibility Files workbook.
